Senior Year

This is it! I’ve decided that I am done with the bullshit fuck boys that live here! I’m going to wait till college for a whole new batch of fuck boys but I can’t keep dealing with the ones here. It’ll never lead to anything good and therefore it is not worth my time! This year everything my friends and I do we will do big and all the way!! By this this time next year my life will be totally different and new things will be happening. I’m nervous that everything is going to be different but at the same time I am really happy because I need change. I need new people who will restore my hopes for a social life. All in all I just want to start my life, my own independent life without people always on my case about the stupidest shit. But on the bright side! NEW GUYS!

Guy that I know I am so over like honestly you have no idea theyre horrible and stupid and why the hell did I waste my time with them? Like am I an idiot? Why cant I just delete their numbers and snapchat and unfollow them on all social media?! It’s like when it’s going good it’s going great but all other times its horrible

Why am I addicted to the wrong people? They are drugs and I always find the strength to quit them and then I relapse and its like WWIII in my head

Can someone please just find me a tattooed dude who is just different from all the assholes here?

“F***boys”.

It really bothers me that there are guys that have amazing personalities, all over just good guys. THEN, they go and mess it up. As in they don’t know what things are appropriate in public or they just say one thing, ONE THING that ruins everything. Everyone sometimes says something stupid, don’t get me wrong, I totally get that, buy I’m not talking about that. Also, when they act like total douche-bags depending on who they are with.

For example, when a guy brags about drinking, smoking, getting with girls, getting high, or just all out gloating about themselves. I understand that some kids need to escapes their lives because things are bad, I get that it may not be the best way to do that but I mean, I get it. I just feel as though there is such a fine line. Someone that thinks that they have the right to drink or whatever to escape there lives, they don’t talk about it, they don’t brag that they do all these things and the most definitely do not try and talk about it every chance that they get. Yet, I also understand that people try to hide there emotions with other emotions, acting like everything is totally fine when in reality they are falling apart.

It just makes me so sad that there are all these totally amazing guys out there who deserve to have people around them that can positively help their lives, even if it is just being a person to listen because they don’t know what to say to make things better. So now there are these guys out there looking for help in the wrong places, with the wrong people and wrong substances, and all these good people are in their lives and they can’t even see that there are people right in front of them, willing to help them in a different ways. Then they go running their mouths about all these parties and things they did when they were drunk, just how awesome they think everything is because they want you to think that they are happy and then you get so mad that they’re doing all this stupid crap and now they’re standing there bragging about it. You just spent the entire day with them and it has been a wicked long day, they just said they were exhausted, now they’re saying that they can’t wait home so they can go out and go to another party with their other friends. Like, it makes me laugh so hard because the person doesn’t see it so it doesn’t even make sense to get into an argument over it with them.

Then they act okay around you, you see them when they aren’t trying to make them self, well whatever. The person you see in that moment is amazing, perfect to you in every way, but they don’t see it and just as soon as the real them came, it’s gone again and there is nothing that you can do about it. This frustrates me so much, how can they not see how amazing they are? How has no one else been able to get through to them, how?

Not a normal welcome to 2015 post

Hey, I know everyone says about making the new year theirs, having all of these unrealistic expectations of what they want to happen in 2015. So they tell people their hopes and dreams for the new year, hoping that the people they tell will help them to accomplish everything that they just poured their hearts out about. Up until that point, most people have determination, until that moment after they pour their hearts out because, unfortunately, those people entrusted with those thoughts break down all of that hope the person built up and at that point all the hope, happiness and such just vanishes because someone tells them that they can’t.

Who, besides you, is to say that you can’t do something? No one. People will always tell you that you can’t do something when you really can’t. EVERYONE is afraid that the people around them will be more successful then they are. Don’t let them win, don’t let them set limits on your life. Just because they want to sit back and do nothing does not mean that you have to sit there with them.

Also, don’t be that person holding other people back. Help them, because when that is you, you will want the help.

PEOPLE. SUCkkkkk

Omfg i really hate people sometimes! this morning i was in a good mood and i made a comment and someone said something and i just snapped like i was perfectly find and u mess it up im not guna say nothing like idgaf about ur opinion when it wasnt asked for so either say something i wana hear or stfu ur opinions invalid -,- like damn what even

people just be supportive and nice and if ur not then dont frigging get pissy when i go off on u and today they were lucky i held back because this persons commet rubbed me the
wrong way and im scary when im mad so dont mess with me like geez

Perfect Guys.

November 16, 2014

Perfect guys don’t exist, I get that. What I don’t understand is that all though life as a child I heard that guys are the ones who will have problems with girls, that they are too clingy or obsess over the stupidest things. It’s not true, it’s not just girls who get that way and from personal experience I know that guys get that way too, if not worse than girls. I don’t think that it is fair that girls have these unreal expectations of guys to always be perfect because that is not true but at the same time I don’t think it’s fair that guys expect girls to be this way. I just think that we need to stop stereotyping people as a society and let people make their own opinions on people. But anyways, I just want a guy who isn’t obnoxious or obsessed with other girls, I don’t think that that is too much to ask for. I don’t think that people should settle for less than they want because they will never be happy.

Numb?

November 11, 2014

Does anyone else ever get the feeling of no feeling? As though nothing matters yet the littlest thing will set you off with anger that you didn’t really realize that you had? Everyone around you gets annoyed with you because they think you’re “in a mood” or just being a bitch? In reality it’s just the opposite… it’s like an out of body experience, as though you’re watching yourself and everything that is happening to you but it doesn’t phase you, just makes you sadder and number. People who haven’t felt this don’t know what it feels like so they just say “get out of the mood” but you physically can’t and no one understands.

Fake People. Picking Battles.

November 4, 2014

Tbh I hate fake people. But in all honesty I understand that sometimes people lie and stuff happens but that’s not what I am talking about. People who constantly lie and try to people-please are extremely annoying. Why do people try to change themselves so that other people like them? They won’t like you for you and you won’t stay friends so it’s not worth it! There are fake people in my life and it really bothers me because some of them are “close” with people I know and some people call me a hypocrite because I don’t tell them off. It’s important to pick battles because if you tell someone off that you see everyday or is in the group you hang with outside of school then it’s going to be miserable for everyone.

Anyways, back to fake people. I don’t really care what your issue is (there are some exceptions) but if you’re fake to get attention, to be in the group you consider “popular” or the group that you can gain the most from, I don’t want you to be my friend. A lot of the time people consider me a bit heartless or cold because I don’t really put up with people that I don’t like but I think of it as me knowing what I want and what I don’t want in my life. To me, fake people really drag others down and in my life I don’t really need that, I need to look out for what is best for me, not everyone else and if that means that I have to have people not in my life and not be popular then I’m okay with that. I’d rather have a handful of people that I can count on then a hundred people that I can’t trust.

I know that there are people in my grade at school that don’t like me but I’m okay with that, if they think that it bothers me at all they are wrong because I don’t care if people like me or not, it doesn’t bother me because it’s not my problem, it’s theirs. Most people that don’t like me I don’t like either so ha. Anyone who doesn’t like you isn’t worth your time, focus on the people you like and care about, the one’s that you can trust because at 2am when everything in your mind is going to hell, they are the only ones that will be there for you, so those fake people, you don’t need them. That doesn’t mean you have to be mean, just don’t go out of your way because they won’t.

Being Liked

November 1, 2014

Why do girls care if guys like them? I know I am exactly the same way but think about it, really think about it. When a guy doesn’t like a girl she thinks that for some reason it is her fault, that she did something wrong to make him not like her. She stays up for hours thinking about him and what she could of done differently. Then, the next time that they see each other she acts differently because now she has spent hours thinking about what he wants, how to change herself to be what he wants. Sometimes it works, the guy ends up falling for her and the girl is so happy. After a while though, at some point, they’ll realize that they aren’t themselves anymore, they are always pretending to be something that they aren’t. At that moment of realization and all the pain that comes with it, facing that fact that she was letting go of her true self, just to please a guy, she realizes that she would have been happier if she just spent a while upset over a guy she didn’t get, rather than living with the fact that she changed herself to please someone else who didn’t like the true her in the first place. You can’t pretend forever and eventually everything will catch up with you.